We’re Pantone’s Creative Team, and We’re Not Apologizing for Forecasting Another Shit Year with a Crappy Color

Creative Director: “Alright, settle down, my dear visionaries! We gather today to present Pantone’s Color of the Year for 2025—the hue that shall permeate the very fabric of our existence: fashion, branding, nail varnishes, and, of course, those extravagantly priced cushions of questionable comfort. Last year, ‘Viva Magenta’ dazzled us—a shade so bold, so vivacious, so alive. In 2024, we sought comfort in ‘Peach Fuzz’ with an aspirational lens of compassion paired with a velvety guise of caring. But frankly, we were wrong, and the air hangs heavy with a certain je ne sais meh. And, according to our research team, 2025’s forecast promises even more doom, gloom, and ‘why bother?’”

Marketing Strategist: “Right. It’s giving… global malaise. Bold and feeling good are over. The vibes? Off. They’re demure. And, frankly, kind of shitty.”

Creative Director: “Resonant. It tickles one’s sensibilities! I deeply respect the sentiment. But before we embark upon this voyage through our crap palette of pedestrian possibilities, let us first pay homage to the hues that dared—but failed—to ascend the chromatic throne.”

Marketing Strategist: “First up in rejected colors, we had #TradRed. It was meant to evoke tradition, simplicity, and wholesomeness. But after six months of, well… certain political events, the feedback was that it felt more like a threat.”

Social Lead:“Yeah, the word cloud we shared in our End-of-Year report was pretty intense. Along with ‘menacing’ and ‘revolt,’ we saw words like ‘war cry,’ ‘uncomfortable Thanksgiving,’ and ‘midlife crisis in flannel.’”

Brand Lead: “Too aggressive. It’s giving ‘hostile grandpa ruins your holiday—and quite possibly your life and/or country.’”

PR: “Yeah, no. Too controversial and enemy territory for the liberal media.”

Marketing Strategist: “Exactly. Then there was Taylor’s Choice Blue. Initially, we thought the Swifties would eat it up, but by Q3, it no longer felt relevant. Plus, there are only so many navy-blue kitchen remodels the world can handle.”

Legal: “That, and her legal team wanted to distance her from any political associations.”

Marketing Strategist: “Next, we considered Burnt Ember, meant to evoke an environmental consciousness. It was moody, dumpster fire-y, but… let’s be honest, it felt too on the nose.”

Brand Lead: “Too ‘post-pandemic shitshow,’ not enough ‘timeless, seasonless despair.’”

Marketing Strategist: “We also thought about more classic colors like Olympic Gold…

Brand Lead: “...But the world—and the news cycle—had already moved on.”

Marketing Strategist: “And finally, Brat Summer Green. This one was a strong contender, and most requested by our intern. It was loud, regressive in a good way, gave zero fucks about the state of the world, and was inspired by the whole ‘brat renaissance’ thing online.”

Color Theorist: “But by fall, everyone decided being a brat was exhausting. It aged out before we even hit the winter of our discontent.”

Creative Director: “And so we arrive at the present moment. A time when the masses have abandoned both boldness and hope. What they crave is a cozy reflection of their weariness, a despondent sort of safety and security. A color that whispers, ‘I am here, I exist… but only barely, for I haven’t yet ingested my morning cup of caffeine.’”

Color Theorist:“That’s why we chose beige—the most self-effacing, meek color imaginable. Collectively, we’ve lowered our expectations. We’re deflated. We’re worn out. Here at Pantone, we scoured the spectrum of quietly shitty neutrals.” (Whips out swatches.) “We considered Leaky Latte, but its warm undertones felt…” 

PR: “...Too hopeful.”

Color Theorist: Emergency Exit Ecru showed promise. It’s a beige for when things go south fast—literally. 

PR: “But it came across as too passive-aggressive for the Southern states.”

Color Theorist: “Soft Serve Surprise?”

PR: “...Too surprising.”

Color Theorist: “After rigorous testing, we settled on Mocha Mousse—a color that is neither overwhelming nor underwhelming. It can only be described as… ‘welming.’”

Brand Lead: “Like a lukewarm cup of coffee with plain oat milk. A tasty, tempting snack de non-resistance.”

Creative Director: “Delightfully uninspiring. Just a stunning sadness shit sandwich masked as a frosty fudge. And what does the data dare to say?”

Marketing Strategist: “In focus groups, 75% of people said they didn’t notice Mocha Mousse on the wall until we pointed it out. Further, our tests showed it caused mild ambivalence in 9 out of 10 participants. Overall, and I’m paraphrasing here, they felt it was so-so to meh.”

Color Theorist: “It’s the color of dreams turning to dust. It’s more desert than dessert. We think people can pair Mocha Mousse with Seasonal Affective Disorder White for a confusing winter palette that softly screams, ‘I’m scaling an emotional, snow-capped mountain of despair… from the comfort of my couch.’”